Americans

Maybe shouldn't be using so many amphetamines?

Language evolution on accident

• the missing u can now be found in poring
• phased for fazed
  • and not always in that order
• trolling for trawling
• could care less
• minimise now means diminish e.g. "the word diminish got minimised"
• entrée
• mind your business
  • i actually like this one

Everything is a gun

• catching strays
• footgun
  • use gotcha instead
• pull the trigger
• smoking gun

Or a car

• ymmv
• stay in your lane
  • https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7syJJrsmrts

Or religious

• jesus take the wheel (religion-car hybrid)
• hail mary [last resort]

Freedom

• except the freedom to cross the road when it's safe to do so
• except the freedom to have a foreskin
• or freedom from ill health, gun crime

Prudishness

• hays code
• nipple police
• but violence is ok

Safety if we really must

• Mansfield bar
• Earnhardt bar

Unless it's food

• must prepare using gloves

Other isms

• prone and supine (mostly prone)
• frowning incorrectly
• being pissed incorrectly
• using the word cunt incorrectly
• the hospital

Relationships

• Poor relationship with food
• Poor relationship with alcohol

Dishonourable mentions

Put a rapist in charge. Twice!

• When he's not raping women he's raping the planet